Where's the Encouragement??

Natural childbirth? Home birth? Induce or go into labor? Breastfeed or formula feed? Swaddle or not? Cover or not to cover? To vaccinate or not? Co-sleep or straight to crib? Home school or Christian school? Small family or Duggar size? (Ok...so I'm still working on that one...I love a big family)

These are just some of the posts I see all over social media these days and let me just say, I'm OVER it! Enough already with the agenda pushing. As a mother of 5, I'm pretty set in my ways. I know how I want to do things. I know how I've messed up and I've learned from my mistakes. I've been induced, I've had epidurals. I've had a natural child birth. I've nursed 5 kids (and ALWAYS use a cover) and send them to a Christian school. I've had babies sleep with me and I've had some that slept well in their beds from early on. The best part is, my husband and I got to choose! Sure people gave suggestions and advice but ultimately the choice was ours based on what we felt was best for us after prayerful consideration.

My point is this, I got to choose how I would mother and raise my children. Did I do it the best and most perfect way? Probably not to a lot of people but it was what was best for me. I'm tired of people "casually" putting their agenda out for everyone to see. As if we don't know what they are posting stuff for.  I'm just ready to see more post encouraging moms. ESPECIALLY new moms. In an age of social media and pictures of smiling moms and precious babies we are often putting a false sense of reality out for these young moms to see. They need to see the struggle of getting used to baby schedules and life as a mom. They need someone telling them they will make it. NOT get on Facebook or Twitter and see that the way they chose to give birth is the reason their baby was/is sick. I think it's time that all moms stop pointing fingers and judging each other's parenting style and just encourage one another the best we know how.

Now, what I'm not saying is that you can't tell people what worked best for you. By all means, whatever choice you make, own it! Love it! Be confident in it but be careful not to push it as "the way people who love Jesus" would do it. I'm all about parenting biblically, but there are some areas that scripture is silent on and we must use prayerful discernment.

I want people to stop pointing fingers and talking about moms behind their backs. I want people to stop making others feel like inadequate mothers and  somehow less godly because of whatever choice they made. I myself am guilty of this very thing, but what good does it do? None. If someone asks my opinion I will give it but if I've not been asked its best that I keep it to myself.

The only thing I feel is vital for us, as mothers, is prayer. Pray for these moms. Pray for wisdom as they embark on this lifelong journey into motherhood. Pray for them to do what scripture is VERY clear about, training our children to know and love Jesus, serving others, spreading the Gospel, loving the Word and the Church.

If you are a home birther or a home school mom, I admire you. If you carried your Baby til 42 weeks and your doctor induced you, I admire you too. If you had a breech baby or baby in
distress and were told you would have to have c-section, I admire you. If you are a nursing mom...WAY TO GO! If you just don't like the idea of nursing and find bottles are great for your family, good for you! I'm done judging. I'm done passing my way off as the best and perfect way. I WILL be an encourager. Even if it kills me. Ha!

My Disney Experience

"Everybody SMILE!!" "Nolan, put your arms down!" "Judd, you have to open your eyes!" "Y'all, just smile!" "We can be done if y'all would just look at the camera and smile, one more time! Please!" 

As a parent, I just wanted a good picture to put in a frame or, more realistically, to make my home screen wallpaper on my phone. I just want everyone to look happy and smile for a picture, when behind every picture was a melt down, a fight, and/or an empty threats. It was very rarely all smiles.  

The picture above took months of planning and preparation!  It was ordering tickets, having shirts and caps embroidered for the girls, and buying matching shirts for the boys. Its was buying everyone new Teva sandals (cause the ones they had just wouldn't cut it). It was packing 7 people and sticking them on a plane without losing anyone or driving an entire plane full of people crazy with fussy, loud children. It was lines and heat and rushing and whining. It was pure chaos! 

I tried my hardest to make sure that the Disney experience was the most magical week of my children's lives, but here was there reality of the week... 

So what did Disney World teach me?  Well, for starters, life isn't about the fake smiles and the posed family pictures.  It's about the memories.  It's about enjoying whatever life throws your way.  It's about learning to walk slowly through the rain and stomping in the puddles.  

It also taught me (gulp....its' about to get serious) that we put a lot of thought and planning into temporary fun.  Sure the memories will last forever (at least for those 5 and above) but at the end of the day, that experience was temporary. The shirts, temporary.  The shoes, temporary. The hats and souvenirs, temporary. I will forever be grateful for the experience, but I want to focus on so much more than the temporary.  I am responsible for 5 beautiful, sinful, heathens and I have the responsibility to pour something into my children that is far more than temporary. These experiences mean very little in the grand scheme of things.  I will not stand before God one day and give an account for all the "experiences" I gave my children while they young, but I will give an account for whether or not I taught them about Jesus.  

The memories we made at "the happiest place on earth" are precious to this momma, but they mean nothing if I fail to point them to Giver of true happiness and the Creator of the heavens and earth.